Russia the Kid
by HetaRussia
Summary: You guys remember the scene where Kid, Liz, and Patty were chasing the theif? Well what happens when it's Russia, Ukraine, and Belarus? Read to find out. Human names used, and a surprise character inside. Not sure if this counts as a cross over...


**HetaRussia here, Okay so this...this I dont even know where this came from...honestly...I dont.**

**Russia is Death the Kid, Ukraine is Liz, Belarus is Patty...AND you'll never guess who Death is...read to find out ^J^**

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Its a dark night in HetaCity all was quite except for the sound of pursuit. A man wearing nothing except white wrist cuffs, a white choker with a black bowtie, and a black black apron around his waist and a large sack fillef to the brim on his back. He emitted mad giggles as he darted down the darken streets before skidding to a stop as his pursuer hot on his tail! Not seeing any other choice the man dashed into the ally hoping to jump the fence, but was met with a large brick wall, a dead end "Bollocks..." he cursed.

"Its all over, Arthur..." a voice cooly replied as gloved hands reached into his coat and pulled out two.

Arthur glared, his face was red, due to a heavy amount of liquor in his system "Why the bloody fail wont you give up!" he slurred as he dropped his sack. He turned to face a young man clad in a Soviet uniform he had green pants, heavy brown boots, a light pink scarf tied loosly around his neck, and in his hands were two identical faucets.

Now it might have been due to the liquor in the Brits system, but then again **"WHAT THE BELL! THE FAUCETS ARE TURNING INTO HUMANS!?"** he screamed with panic entering his voice, indeed the two faucets glowed and began taking human form!

Both faucets were female, one had a white blouse with blue overalls, her hair the same color as her meisters. The other was smaller compared to the two she wore a dark blue and white dress with a white bow in her hair, her hair was a shade darker than the others.

Arthur watched as the threesome lined up and made a strange formation. The male was on his knees, the smaller girl was behind him, her legs were spread as she leaned in with her arms out, though you should note that she stood a few inches to the left. The other female stood directly behind the male and female, her arms out and up to making a 'Y' shape with her legs together.

"Arthur Kirkland...!" said the childish man.

Arthur grunted and took a step back his face one of shock.

"We're here for your soul!" the three said in unison!

_'I take the idea of perfection...' _the childish Russian thought. "..."

Suddenly something told the Russian to look down, his amethyst eyes dropped down to the floor, to the younger girl to be exact. And there it was!

He leapt up and screamed **"HEY YOU! NATALIA! YOUR POSE VAS OFF A LITTLE!"** there it was! Natalia simply looked down "Hm? Sorry..." she grunted, she honestly did that just to see him get upset, she loved how his face turned red, unlike most weapons, this one was madly in love with her meister!

_'maybe...to unhealthy extremes...' _he added to his thoughts.

"Hey Ivan...d-dont you think th-this may not be the best time to talk about that?"

Ivan gave a smile "No matter about time, I want everything to go "perfectly"!" he said doing the quote motion, meanwhile Natalia watched as Arthur shoved the bag in the manhole and began jumping on it, his face in a twisted drunk smile. Natalia only blinked when the British man escaped "Hey, that guy we been chasing made his escape..." she said plainly.

But Ivan heard nothing of it once you got him started on this subject there was no turning back! "Anyways, didn't I tell you, Katyusha? My art is symmetrical, symmetry is the supreme beauty!"

Katyusha smiled weakly and sweatdropped "H-Here we go..." she mumbled nervously.

"I told you, vhen I picked the Два* of you for my double faucet team partners that you Два* were symmetrical?" he said sweetly. Suddenly without a single warning Ivan's voice turned into venom "But then vhen you're human you dva...the hair cut...the height, its all vrong!" he said distress entering his voice.

Once more without warning Ivan grabbed both females bah-hoobies and squeezed them "**EVEN YOUR CUP SIZZES ARE DIFFERENT AREN'T THEY!?"** he shrieked. Katyusha paled while Natalia blushed "W-Well e-excuse me f-for being larger than my s-sister!" wailed Katyusha as she slammed a fist into Ivans face, as she began sobbing and ran off her chest chest bouncing comically.

Natalia didn't react anyway negatively she blushed and the. smiled creepily "My meister...he...he..." she smiled and giggled, okay more like cackled. She made way to her meister and was about to touch him, but froze when she heard the infamous _"Boing~ Boing~"_ of her sisters chest. Katyusha stormed straight towards Ivan, her cheeks soaked with tears her lip poking out "Wh-Whats so s-symmetrical about you anyway!? Your so symmetrical except for your hair st-style and the f-fact you have only one badge! Your totally asymmetrical!" Katyusha said in a broken voice.

This caused Ivan to choke on his on air, he looked absolutely unfazed, that is until he dashed to the nearest window and looked at his hair, it was true his bangs were going everywhere except where he wanted! Oh how he tried many times to fix that! Then his eyes landed on the badge...why didn't he buy two?! Oh why was he so stupid!

He looked back at his weapons and his face crumpled he tried to run but only succeeded in tripping and conveniently landed under a lone street lamp that was one, to the sisters it looked like a spotlight.

"Why am I so disgusting!? A Свинья*? Born with untamable hair? I cursed to live the worthless life of trash!" Ivan sobbed as he curled over himself, his belly touching his knees and rump on his heels as he pounded the ground. Katyusha and Natalia could only watched as he fretted "Th-There he goes again Natalia." Katyusha said as she began patching up the popped button. Natalia only replied with "Marriage! Marriage! Marriage!"

Well to be honest Kat did feel bad about bringing up the subject so she walked up to him and smiled "Ivan, your the best! Your gonna be the God Of Death! What matters 'bout unmanageable hair or a stupid badge?" she said patting his head gently "Yeah...your not a pig, pigs are loud and chant about being heroic..." Natalia said petting his head (okay it was more like whacking).

Ivan looked up his eyes shinning with tears and his nose running a bit "Really? You guys don't think I'm useless pile of garbage?" he asked hopefully. Both sisters "Sure! Of course not." smiled Katyusha "Pigs are Capitalist anyway..." Natalia said with a smile.

"Okay, I'll report to Отец*!" Ivan said childishly, well this left Katyusha wondering "I cant tell if he's hard to handle, easy to handle, he's so spoiled!" she said to herself.

After a series of hand movements, a skull appeared and there was Kiev Rus (okay more like a window to him...you get it...) Kiev Rus smiled "Lo~ Hello~ Oh Ivan your hair is super cute today!" he said with a smile. Ivan on the other hand felt is eyebrow twitch " Отец you now that topic bugs me, never bring it up a again, da?" Ivan said cooly. Kiev Rus chuckled and bounced on his heels "Now, Now all is good, da? I assume your soul collecting is going vell?" he asked, he knew the answer how could Ivan possibly fail?

"Now Ivan, you do realize that your a Shinigami of Countries, right? So you really don't need to collect souls or raise veapons." his father said. Ivan simply smiled "But I vant to make my own veapon my own vay." he said sounding like a child being denied a Roy they wanted. His father saw no use in fighting and said "But you have Два veapons, that means twice the vork." he then turned to Kat and Natalia "Hullo, Howdy!" Katyusha smiled and waved "Hullo" while Natalia let out a unintelligible growl.

Ivan smiled even wider "That's vhy I vant to collect all the souls at once..." he suddenly looked bashful "Do you think that's a good goal?" he asked nervously. His dad stared at him in surprise "Vell, yeah but if that's how you gonna act hows this sound?" Rus said.

That instant Anubis appeared in front of them "The pyramid of Анубис*" is in the sorching country of Египет*...out there a necromancer witch makes mummies vith the vandering souls. After night the mummies come up and fall on any sleepvalking people they find." Kiev Rus said a little to happily.

The others stood there, each a different look on their faces, Ivan was smiling daydreaming and fangirling in his head about all the symmetrical things he will find inside, but he managed to say "Pyramid Anbuis? The architecture of that time was based off symmetry! Отлично* Vhen ve go ve can admire ruins and exterminate a vitch, ufu~" Ivan said.

Katyusha looked terrorfied and Natalia...nothing really. Kiev Rus smiled and called out "Natalia, Katyusha. You've been put through a lot, but please take good care of him!" Both looked back and called out "Wouldn't have it any other w-way."

"I cant promise he'll be single when we get back..."

And with that Ivan waved off "Vill be leaving now."

And thus their journy begins!

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**Heta: Yeah...I dont know...just accept it...*lays on ground***

**Russia: *dazed* I touched my sisters...**

**Belarus: *Giggle* Thank You Heta for that moment...**

**Heta: OH! I dont own the script it came from manga...but wish i did...da *lays down on ground again***

**Translations: Два= Two**

**Свинья= Pig**

**Отец= Father**

**Анубис= Anubis **

**Египет= Egypt**

**Отлично= Excellent**


End file.
